Remind me...

Someday when this little monster is a teenager...
and driving me crazy...
and the house is a mess because his clothes and toys and shoes are all over...
and he tells me "you just don't understand, mom"...
and I suddenly become the dumbest person he's ever met...
and it's not cool to spend time with mom and dad, only with friends...
and he doesn't want to take care of his sister, dog, gold fish, whatever...

REMIND ME...
how much I prayed to be blessed with the ability to have children...
how much I prayed to not miscarry...
how much I prayed for all his pieces, systems, etc. to develop appropriately...
how much I loved having him inside of me to talk to every day, when he couldn't talk back...
how much Steven and I NEEDED to have a baby to complete our little family...

Remind me how much I wanted him to be here and how impatient I got while waiting for him. Remind me.

How are you?

So, since everyone and their mom (literally) asks me this all the time, I will tell you.

I am still pregnant.


I am 34.6 pounds (at last weigh-in) bigger than I ever have been in my life.

I am tired of hearing about how everyone else I know has already had their baby or has a scheduled C-section. Not that I'm not happy for you, I just want my own baby to join the party.

I am miserable. Steven told me I have chronic miserable-ness. He's right. I even tried avoiding going out with people for an entire week because I was afraid I was too miserable to be around. When I finally did go out, I talked to one of my friends and it turns out, I'm just miserable at home around Steven...because I can be-but not around everyone else (thank you Anna!)

I am having regular contractions...they just don't progress or get worse. I have been having them for 3 days steadily and the past 2 weeks on and off.

I am having all sorts of other weird things happening (pressure in my pelvis, etc. etc. ) I told my doctor and she just smiled and said "Good. Your body is getting ready for baby"

I am dilated to almost a 3, 75% effaced, and the baby's head is dropped so low that they don't even count it after it goes further than this because he'll be coming out.

I am super tired of heartburn. Honestly, even water gives me heartburn. I sleep propped up with 4 pillows so I don't feel like gagging all night.

I am fully packed, prepped, and ready to leave for the hospital. I bought myself a hospital bag-it's super cute and has pink giraffe trim on it.

I am not sleeping through the night. Besides having to get up and pee, it's just uncomfortable having a small beach ball (Steven has upgraded my size category from basketball) to try and work around. But hey, good practice for the little one right?

I am even working ahead in my classes so just in case I have to leave to the hospital, I'm ready. My classes are over in 2 weeks and I've done most of the work already. Normally, that would be great except now I'm running out of things to do.

I am project-less. Over the summer I started collecting these unfinished projects. Well, they're finished, done, hanging up, whatever. I even made up about 25 new projects and they are all done too.

I am 80% done with Christmas presents...and Steven and I made all of them.

I am still hungry all the time. I have to eat little portions 85 times a day. There is just no room in me for my a full stomach, a fully-cooked baby, and all the organs and other important stuff.

I am tired of people telling me I look cute. Really, I appreciate it, but I have a mirror...I know what I look like.

I am currently watching my delirious husband give me a sock puppet show at the top of my computer screen because he is just as bored as me. I wish I was joking about this one.

I am 37 weeks 3 days pregnant, technically full term, and wishing more and more that I wasn't running out of things to do waiting for this little guy to make his entrance.

So there you go...since you asked ;)

Dr. Visit #2

Sooo it has been awhile since we updated. Steven had a bout with pneumonia, we faced a flood (that turned out to be minor) and enjoyed Easter. Those posts will come later, but here is the latest about our adventures to parenthood!

For all of you who did not read my facebook status, today was one of the longest days of my life and included a 3 1/2 hr doctor appointment. This was the first appointment at the OB/GYN office. We got to the hospital center at about 1:30 to check in and register. That didn't take too long and I was upstairs and back with a nurse by 1:45. First off, I have gained about 4 lbs 8 oz since becoming pregnant. I think it is actually a bit less because I had my jacket on while being weighed. It is weird to see the scale keep going after where you are used to it stopping...
Now there were a lot of contributing factors to why this visit was so long. First, today is the first day they are all moving to a mostly-electronic system of records. Let's just say I'm almost positive they were inadequately trained (that is my professional decision!) So with the initial nurse, I got asked all of the questions at least twice. She was keeping a paper record and trying to write it in the computer system that she did not like or understand.
Eventually, the nurse practitioner finally came in. We went through the health history part which took FOREVER because of this new program. And they didn't ask me anything about Steven's side of the family- is that normal? They asked about me, my parents, my grandparents, my siblings and all of my aunts and uncles but NOTHING about Steven...isn't he half of the contributing factor to this child?
After that and a brief discussion about my prenatal vitamin (I'm going to start taking a prescription one I guess) the real fun began. First, she let me hear the heartbeat sort of as an incentive to go through the rest of the visit I think. I don't know if it is just me or what but it always takes them a little while to find the baby and get the heartbeat. Long enough that I start to think that maybe I'm making all this up, gaining weight, and there is no baby inside me! But every time they find the baby and all is well :) I can hear my heart start beating faster every time I go through that little panic that there is no baby. It's not that I don't feel, look, and act pregnant in every regard but wouldn't that be embarrassing if there was NO baby in there? Call me crazy...
Anyways, I won't go into details of my full body inside, outside, up and down exam but I will say it was not as bad as I had conjured it up in my head to be, but it was pretty invasive. It didn't take as long as I was expecting, for which I was grateful. It is so relieving to know that I am all around healthy, a blessing that I am realizing more and more.
After I got to get dressed again, the nurse practitioner came back in and we went through this mound of handouts and papers they gave me. A lot of the info I had already learned from my copies of What to Expect When You're Expecting and Pregnancy for Dummies. The one thing we talked more about was diet and prenatal testing that we will have to decide on. They gave me this book and the NP gave me page numbers to reference certain things for next time. She was good about not giving me way more information than I could take in at one time.
After we got through the folder of stuff, I went and got Steven so he could hear the heartbeat. Again, she had a hard time finding the baby and I panicked a little...it can't just disappear in the course of an hour can it?! But she got it and we could hear the heartbeat again. I love watching Steven's face when this happens. He comes back with me looking and probably feeling rather uncomfortable (no man wants to know what happens at the OB office I'm pretty sure) BUT as soon as the heartbeat comes on the monitor he gets a big smile on his face...I love it.
After hearing the heartbeat, the nurse left to go double check on my lab orders. While she was gone, I used the visual aids in the room to show Steven exactly what had happened to me in the past hour and a half. All he could say was, "I'm lucky to be a man..." and he kind of shuddered. He is right but our baby will be so worth all of this in the end.
Are you still with me? because the fun part is coming up ;)
After talking through some prenatal testing info with the NP with Steven there (decisions we have to make for next time) we were sent to the lab for more poking and prodding.
The girl asked me if I could give her a urine sample.
What I wanted to say was: "Girl, I'm pregnant yes I can pee in the cup"
What I think actually came out was something like: "YES! I thought you would never ask" How embarrassing...
After wards, I had to get a LOT of blood taken. In the few times I have had blood taken, I was in my own room with lots of privacy and there was a bed. At the lab, they have tiny cubicle things with just the chairs...I immediately sensed this to be problematic. Last time I had to get blood drawn was when we were engaged. They couldn't get it out of my arm and halfway through the first vial I got dizzy and about passed out when they moved me to the bed. They ended up taking it out of the back of my hand and I was dizzy for about an hour....so you could sense my anxiety over today.
Now, I knew I had to get blood taken today. I figured it would just be one or two of those tiny vials. We were at the hospital like 2 weeks ago with Steven and he only had to do these tiny vials and only like 2. Well the things the girl pulled out were about as long as my forearm and I think there were 6! But I saw an empty one at the end...so maybe she only took 5. They got me juice because I warned her I am not very good at this sort of thing. I was impressed that she got the blood out of my inner elbow. She told me she had too because she had to take a lot of blood and it was too much to take out of my hand...why that didn't send off a warning sign, I don't know...When she was done, I glanced at the blood on the counter. I always thought my blood would have more of a pink tint to it and I wanted to see it (it doesn't, bummer I ate pink starbursts all morning just in case it would help)...I figured I could handle it now that I am getting those special mom powers...well it didn't make me sick, but it didn't help the already queasy feeling I was getting. So I felt like an idiot but I slowly stood up and kept drinking my juice. She told me I could leave it there but I didn't want to risk it so I sipped it all the way back out to Steven and all the way back to the elevators and upstairs to the doctor.
I was feeling weak but I figured that was a combination of the whole visit and that I was getting hungry again. We went to schedule my return visit. In the process one of the nurses was like "Don't forget your immunizations" At first, I didn't even know what she was talking about...then I remembered that they had asked me when my last tetanus shot had been (I told them I'd have to ask my mom...I am totally an adult) but we had also talked about flu shots and the H1N1 vaccination. I didn't realize they were going to give me shots today! I thought it was like everything else where they say, "Think about it and come prepared with a decision next time"
We scheduled our appointment and went back to the room. The nurse brought in the shots and found some paperwork I needed to fill out. She left us with the shots on the counter right by my papers (with 2-3" needles on each one). I should have recognized something was up because my handwriting was kind of shaky. Instead I was feeling pretty proud of myself that I had not fainted in the lab and was almost done! After she got the paperwork, she had me stand and gave me a shot in my right arm (which is currently feeling like dead weight after all it's been through today). I thought it was the seasonal flu shot, but now I'm thinking it might have been that tetanus shot...we will have to check when we go back (isn't that terrible?!) Now you can see how out of it I was at this point. She had me stand there and was getting the H1N1 shot ready.
Now, I think I will explain why I chose to get that vaccine. First off, most people know that I was working at a daycare when H1N1 came about and the panic that ensued. I thought lots of parents were crazy to give their babies this vaccine as soon as it came out. Also, in general I am usually very opposed to flu shots anyways. I do not get the flu during flu season...I do not even remember the last time I threw up (a pregnancy blessing indeed). Even when at the day care I would drink lots of juice, take Vitamin C and sometimes Airborne. I generally am very healthy and have never seen the necessity to get flu shots. Oh, and someone told me flu shots have formaldehyde in them...I'm still looking into that. Well, the first week we moved here I found out that someone in our new ward had died of the swine flu. Then today, when talking with the NP she told me that H1N1 has really run rampant here in GF. She said she wished she could tell me that it was mostly under control here, but many people are still getting it (didn't this all start like a year ago?!) She also told me that if I got it, we would almost 100% loose the baby and I was at a higher risk of death because of all the things I can't take and they can't do while pregnant. I told Steven this and he said I was easily swayed...but when I was talking to the nurse this was the only thing she highly recommended I take--everything else including a stronger prenatal vitamin was left up to me to decide. Also, she pointed out that there is a special dosage of the vaccine for pregnant women. So, I felt I would be ok and just in case I would go ahead and get the vaccine. There is my reasoning...which is kind of irrelevant now-keep reading.
So I got the first shot (that I need to find out what it was tetanus or the regular flu shot) and I was still standing talking to the nurse while she got the H1N1 ready. I was standing there talking and I started sweating and things kept falling off to the side of my vision and I noticed I was dizzy. It felt like I had stood up too fast. I tried just holding onto the chair but that didn't help. So I mumbled something about dizzy and sort of fell into the chair. Well people started moving. Steven said something like "oh no save my wife" (ok not that dramatic but a girl can dream...and he did say something) the nurse opened the door and went and said something to someone she opened the cupboards, turned the water on, and started getting something wet (I later learned was a paper towel) Then in came the nurse practitioner who had me lay down on the table which I don't even know how I got there. Then she held my feet up while she sent the nurse to go get pillows and a washcloth. And I just laid there thinking how embarrassing, I was doing so good too! When things calmed down, I just laid there and tried to calm myself down and Steven talked to me so I was ok. The nurse left the door open and then kept coming in to ask how I was doing. To be honest I don't even know all that happened...I think Steven filled out a form and people kept coming in but I just laid there and tried to relax. After about 15-20 mins the NP came in and I was feeling quite a bit better and apparently looked a little better too. She told me I had been through enough for one day and they would schedule the H1N1 for next week. So after all of my debating in my head and everything about the vaccine, I didn't even get it! I felt like going down to the lab and telling the girl "HA I told you I would get dizzy! I just about died upstairs" But by the time we got out of there (they couldn't get the computer to make another appointment for me-HA) all I wanted to do was eat and lay down (but not in that order because I learned that is a no-no for pregnancy)
So my dear, sweet, supportive husband, took me to Subway to get a tuna sandwich. I learned I can have tuna and the only time I get that is at Subway because Steven doesn't like it. After eating and finally getting home the whole trip had been about 4 hours... I was feeling a lot better, but SUPER exhausted.
We came home and I started reading for my classes and Steven studied for his tests. He is pretty wonderful to sit in the waiting room for at least 2 hours to hear 30 seconds of our baby's heartbeat. Good thing he was there because I probably could not have driven home. He is also a good sport to let me eat tuna. All in all, he is fantastic and taking very good care of me. Not once in this pregnancy have I felt like I was doing it alone :)
We had quite the experience today but I have been assured the next check up will be MUCH shorter and I don't think much if any blood has to be taken! My right arm is sore in two places and moving or flexing any of the muscles hurts, but I'm sure that will wear off.
If you made it this far in the post, congratulations! I hope you had fun reading and Hey- at least it didn't happen to you!! :)

5 Things People Don't Tell You About Being Pregnant-First Trimester

So, I realize that I am fairly new at this pregnancy thing, but I have already learned a few things that I feel other people who are not pregnant yet may benefit from hearing. So here are five things no one told me about being pregnant-first trimester version.

1. Pregnancy actually consists of 40 weeks...which is more like 10 months. People just say 9 months because you may don't really get pregnant until 2 weeks have passed and after 38 weeks your baby is considered full term AND I think they say that so you can count in TRImesters...but still. You are counting down 40 weeks, not 36- just FYI. In some Asian countries, they consider the gestational age 10 months (Thank you Pregnancy for Dummies for clarifying that fact)

2. You will have gas and it will be embarrassing...even if it is just around your husband. Just ask Steven. I thought I had a few months for that part to happen, but it started right away...I can't wait to go to my in-laws in a few weeks.

3. Being sick when you are pregnant is 1000 times more miserable. I just found that one out yesterday. Your whole body aches and your head feels like it might explode but you are still craving pickles (or in my case, cheese).

4. At first, your baby bump just looks like you have eaten too many Oreos (which in my case might be true). Right now my bump is more like a chub...and it's inconveniently placed so my pants are starting to get uncomfortable. Bring on the bump- I want people to see it!

5. Your husband may or may not experience symptoms of pregnancy with you. Steven considers himself man pregnant. He has cravings and is still trying to out eat me at every meal. Maybe this is just a Steven thing, but I think it might be a husband thing. So ladies, give your husband some extra attention. Remind him you are eating for 2 and he doesn't need to out eat you. Seriously, Steven has gained more weight than me so far...and if he keeps going, he will have a bigger bump than me. *As I type this he is currently frosting cinnamon rolls, see my point?*

And- the one thing I knew before pregnancy but I'll share any way: Pregnancy is an excuse to be crazy. You can be hungry, thirsty, tired, irritated, all at the same time. All you have to say is "I'm Pregnant" and people instantly understand. Well it took Steven awhile to catch on, but he's got it now and things are going much smoother. He's starting to understand the importance of fulfilling cravings too. i.e. If you don't get me Oreos tonight on your way home, I may wake up at 2 am and want them and it will be harder for you to find them in the middle of the night.

We are excited and enjoying every minute.